A Killer or a Lover?
by RaveyRai
Summary: Hi. I'm Kairi Ishima. My life is unbearable. HIS isn't. HE'S like everyone else. Safe and Happy. So...why am I stalking HIM? Why do I want to kill HIM? Am I going insane, harboring the instincts of a killer...or a lover...? AU CH.7 UP!
1. Chapter 1

_**Story: A Killer or a Lover?**_

_**Summary: Hi. I'm Kairi Ishima. My life is unbearable. HIS isn't. HE'S like everyone else. Safe and Happy. So...why am I stalking HIM? **_

**A/N:**_I know. I'm horrible. I'm evil. But you know? I don't give-a-care. I wanted to do an angst and romance story. A little Thriller . . .I think. Or to be in the mind of a pycho. Kairi,being the one who's pyscho. Drama and thriller! Yay for thrillers. WOOT! YEEAAHH! . . .ok . . . .I'm calm again. . . ._

**:Disclaimer: I never get what I want. Point. Blank. And if you think hard on what I jus said then you will get what I mean when I don't own KH.

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**CH.1 My MiNd**

_I'm good at it now..._

What am I good at you ask? I'm not so sure myself. I guess following people without them noticing me. It's quite easy I might add. They never hear me follow. But I never follow just so many. He's my first. He was different. He stuck out. He interested me. Like when you see a two-headed dog that happens to be extremly cute that you find it so fascinating. So . . .you follow it.

At first I just watch him sit down on the bus, right in the back, about two or three seats away from me. He sat three seats away from the back. Either way, however,he was still in the _back_. He always sat there, looking out the window, eating some Hershey's products or I presume his Favorite fruit Sodas. _Fanta_ mainly. He never noticed me and I want it that way. I don't want to meet him. Not just yet. _Not now..._

Usaully I would never keep my eyes off him. He was attracting for some reason. And no, I didn't love the guy. I just watched him. Where he got on the bus, I watch. And where he got off, I watched. I kept doing that until it finally turned into a sudden habit. I couldn't resist as soon as he put his foot on the bus. He never took a school bus. We were in a city. We rode Public buses.

Soon afterwards I grew so interested I took my jornal to the bus, sat, and waited untill he came on. I watched the time to see when he came on. 2:30 pm he got on. 3:15, he got off to go home. It surprised me how much I was into his buisness when we are complete strangers. I felt awkward and stupid but that left my system when I started bringing a camera on the bus and took unexpected, no-flash, silent pictures. He looked good I must admit. He had amazing blue eyes. Eyes deeper and fuller in life than mine. He had odd hair but that was one of many qualities that I was fond of him. He had spikey sunburnt hair. A cunning brunette. He had a slight tan. Very slight. I'm paler than him.

He looked my age. Around 16. He looks it so I guess since he gets on this bus at 2:30 that in that area there's a Highschool. I was right. He goes to Staneler High. My school is about 20 blocks away.

After the jornal entries and pictures of him, I had got the guts to actually get off on his stop and follow him. At first I almost lost him. But after doing this almost everyday, I grew more and more clever and sneaky. If turned and spotted me I would calmly turn a corner so that he wouldn't be suspicious. I then, one day, followed him to his house. He lived in a townhouse. A brick covered one, with a green door. I put this in my jornal. I wrote his address and the stops he gets on and off at, just in case I forget. But, I don't know his name. So I came up with "Sora" for his eyes. "Sora", after all, meant sky in japanese. And guess what. Ironiclly--

_--that _was_ his name..._

I saw it when he dropped his binder, one time, on the bus' floor and on it was his name...

_...Sora Hitoshi..._

I didn't pick it up, nor did I tap him on his shoulder to tell him it was his. It's very important for him not to know me. Instead, I disguised my voice and called out,"Sora! You dropped something!"

His head immediately turned at the reply. Everyone looked around to see who said it. And to fit in, I did too. Sora blinked then bent down to get his binder. He picked it up and left the bus with a flustered look on his face. I smiled, he was meant for something. For I wouldn't do all this for something meaningless.

So I got real good at it. Stalking him. Why do I do it? Donnu. I just did. Sometimes he brought a friend. His friend was charming. Kinda slim, kinda stocky. He had silver hair, and electricfying blue eyes. I tried to watch Sora but then I realized his "friend" would spot me and smirk a little. That pissed me off. What if he told Sora about me? So whenever Sora brought his friend I would use all my strength not to look at them. And let me tell you, it was hard. Staring and watching Sora was a habit and like all habits, it was hard to control myself. Good thing sbout Sora's friend was that Sora talked. In most of the days Sora has been on this bus alone, he has _never_ spoke. But with Sora's silver haired friend, it was like someone unmute Sora. They talked about random things, sports, songs, gossip, cars, shows, and boy stuff. I would sometimes, quickly, write down the conversations. Writing it down was fun and helped me on who Sora was. He was, in my jornal entries, fun, active, funny, slightly but very, very small a perv, and childish. I never caught Sora's friend's name, so I named him "Silver". Cool, huh?

After two months of doing this I realizd that I was obsessed with him. No, I don't love him. He was like a drug. I was addicted to him. I knew so much about him from his grade scores to his favorite color. (I leraned this from him talking to Silver.)Then--am I _crazy_? I never spoke to this guy yet I know so much about him that a stranger shouldn't know. I stalked him. I took pictures of him without him noticing. I wrote down where he lives.I wrote down what time he gets on and off the bus. I know where he goes to school at. I know what Soda products he loves to drink. God, I wrote down his conversations. This is _not_ normal for _anybody_ to do. So...why do I do it? Why am I addicted to this character's life so much? Why am I obsessed? The scarey thing is that after doing this so much, it became less weird and creepy. And what's scarier than that is I know the answers to those questions. It's--

_It's because I don't have what he has . . .a _life. . .

I see him and he has power. I know he does. His eyes says "I'm confident", and mines says "I hate my life". My life...isn't his life...my life belongs to someone who has more power than me...

_My Granny . . ._

0o0o0o0

_I have no home..._

Let me define what a "Home" is. Home is a place where you can turn to safety and comfort. I don't have that. I have a house. A building where I sleep and hardly eat. My house,it seeps and sucks the energy out of me. I'm powerless here. How I long to be powerful. To decide someone's fate. Yes, that will be nice.

"Hey kid! You're late!"

That's Granny. Sweet, 85 year old Granny. You would think she would be in a rolling chair by now. Nope. She walks like she's 20. She hits hard like a Pro Wrestler.

"BRAT! Come. NOW!"

I walk toward the small living room where it was dark and the light from the tv sat far in front of Granny.

"Yes ma'am...?"

Granny glared at me,"You're late." She picked up her cane and shook it at me threatning,"You _know_ I need my medicne! Do you _want_ to see me in a _coffin_!"

I looked down, muttering a quiet,"Yes." Thank the Lord that she's super old. She wouldn't hear a T-rex roar in the house she's so deaf. Doctor says she will be when she hits to be 90.

"Go get my medicine! NOW!"

Like a robot, I walked out the room to the bathroom in the house, and looked in the medicine cabnet. These are extinct, I belive.

I stared at the medicine Granny needs. I've always thought about just going to my basement room and wait untill she falls and dies. Many times I watch the thing that helps her have the energy to beat me, slap me, and abuse me with. I give her her bullets. Those pills were her bullets. Many times I thought about killing her myself. But I couldn't do that...right? If I had I felt like she was like an alien. Cut her and some black, green, or blue blood would squirt out and burn me senseless.

After all...she _is_ powerful.

How I long for that power.

"BRAT!"

"Coming!" I grabbed the medicine and ran to her. For taking so long, she hit me with her cane, right at my knee. I bent down, hugging the now getting bruised up knee. It really, _really_ hurt. I bit my lip, trying my hardest not to cry.

She drunk the water and swallowed two of her pills ever so calmly that I felt rage seep into me.She stood, and let me tell you she was like a bear. She was that huge. Not as wide, not as tall. Just huge. Was it her power?

She picked me up by the hair. I stood to my feet, biting harder at the pain this Old Bitch was giving me. My hair and head was sensitive and her pulling on it got my heart racing with fear and anger.My body shook under this woman. She was that powerful.

"You're just like your mother! An ugly whore!"

I bit harder, as she led me to my room which was in the small basement. She pushed me in and closed the door. Locking the lock from outside,"Little bastards like you don't deserve to see the light of day. No sense in giving freedom to you." Then she left. Shoot me. She's no alien. A witch. A horrible old with. And I slept in the same house as she. The names she calls me hurt but they're my names. I always have to remind myself my name is Kairi Ishima.

Why does she lock me up you ask? She thinks I would kill her or something. I would too if I had the guts to. I went to my jornal and looked at the pictures of Sora. It's not fair. How can that old hag I live with can go out whenever and have fun and I can't? It's not fair that Sora has a power and I don't. That he can smile and I can't. That he can have a _life_ and I never can. It's not fair...

_So...how about I take _away_ their lives?_

0o0o0o0

I never at all had a criminal record. To murder is an extreme level. Baby steps. I read books. I know what I must do.

_"Kill something smaller...than get bigger..."_

First things firts. Escape this room. The Old Bitch has a low memory gland or something like that. The door. I need to break the lock. I stared at it. Many times I had bruied myself to get out. To get out of the cage that Old Bitch locks me up in. So maybe it'll give way. I started to hit myself against it. Blood trinkled. It seeped through my shirt. But that won't stop me. No,no. It certainly won't. I hit against it and the hedges finally gave way. I fell to the cold basement floor. My blood was thick and heavy scented. I blinked as I stared up to the ceiling. I felt tingly all over. I felt reborned. I - I - I -

--_was free!_

I smiled. Yes. I'm free. I stood and silently went upstaird with my bookbag on my back. Looking down the hall, I heard Granny snoring. She snores like a monster. I went to the bathroom and cleaned myself up. Then I went to the living room. Granny sat in her chair, knocked out. I saw a cut on her hand. I blinked, shocked. Blood. Red. It was red. I touched it with fascination.

_So. The Old Hag ISN'T an alien or a witch after all..._

She's a human. With Red blood. Like me. The blood shined, gleamed to me. I grinned. I then tip-toed to the kitchen and found a butcher knife. Aw! My weapon. I smiled at it. It suddenly was my friend. A friend that won't criticze me, or talk back at me. It will do my work. It will draw blood, fear. This knife will give me that power I need. That power I need so much. And it was there. Sitting there. Calling me. I took it and a sensation overtook me. My Gosh! It felt so good! If this thing can give me this powerful, what about a gun?

_Woah. Calm down, Kairi._

I took breaths and grinned to the sharp blade that will help me decide someone's fate. But tonight, just a small critter. I won't go kill someone. Not untill I have experience. _Lots_ of experience.

I slipped out the house into the dark, hot night. I still continued to feel the power go through my veins. My mind raced. I couldn't belive I was going to kill something. It's breathtaking. I wonder if I kept this knife in my bag to school, will I still have that power? I can't just continue using this blade. I need other weapons. Like poisons, pocket knives, wait...I can use my _brain_ as a weapon. I do get High grades. I can research on bombs and it won't be those dumb prnak bombs. Fires. Fire is perfect...

As I continued thinking about my long list of murderous and voilent schemes, I spotted low scratching noises. I stared into the alleyway, the streetlight shone in it. A smile crept on my face.

My first victim.

A rat. It's perfect! Nobody likes rats anyways. The world would be a better place without them. Right? Right. I don't like Rats either. They're ugly and hairy. Heh, reminds me of the Old Bitch. A new nickname for Granny next to Old Bitch, and Old Hag. The Old Rat...perfect. Fits her great.

I looked at the rat as I crept near to it. It stopped eating its food and looked bloody. I licked my lips. My heart drummed in my ears. _This is it..._

The Rat must have sensed I was danger because now its hair stuck up and it showed its horrible, croocked, sharp teeth. I glared down at it, squeezing the handle of the Knife. _I_ decided the rat's life. _I_ decie if he lives or dies. Then I saw Old Hag's face on the ugly mammal's face. She bared her teeth. I could hear her yell at me,"_You worthless peice of--"_

_Pierce-squirt-kHhSeEcK!_

My herat was running a marathon as I gasped for air. I was hypervenalating. I blinked. The knife was stabbed in the rat's back. It shook. It breathed its last breath. I heard a soft whimper before it finally stopped shaking. I saw its blood spread underneath it. I was breathing in a lot. I took the blade out, shakingly. My hand was real pale.

_I...I...I killed it..._

I closed my eyes then I felt that my lips curved upwards. _Power_. I ended its life. _Power_. I choose its fate. _Power_...

_I have the power._

I stood as I looked down at the dead rat and grinned. A new desire overtook me.

_I want more power..._

I'll kill another rat. And another. And another. Then get bigger. Like Fires, or even cats. Fire, yes, that's big. Fire is pretty after all. Yes. _Power._ I will use that to gain power. Yes. That's good.

_And then. I was happy.

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**A/N:**_ Ok... I made Kairi a lunatic! You don't get that much here! Woo-hoo! And just so yaw know, I'm not a killer or serial murderer. I read a book that was on that, kinda. Next chapter I will tell. Kay1 Bye1 And don't forget to REVIEW!_

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	2. Chapter 2

**CH.2 DeSePeRaTiOn, A nEw ObStIcLe**

**A/N:**_This story is well...it makes me work and research things...I hate work and researching stuff... Anyways it makes my stomach churn whenever I write it 'cause, you know, I NEVVER wrote anything like this. It's short I must add, and I don't really favor this chaptah 'cause...I don't know. I'm da Author so I can say whether I like chaptahs or not. There, that's all to be said. I think...But then I'm just talkin' to mehself._

**Disclaimer: Mannnn. If I owned Kh or Com:KH and KH2 then I would publish and know what will actaully happen in the game. But do I? No. I don't.

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_Jornal Entry:#25_

_His friend, Silver, came on the bus again. He's smiling like life is good when I bet he knows it isn't. Lucky him, however. Sora and Silver seem nice I guess. How can you be so nice, calm and happy when the world out there is full of crap? I have yet to answer that, and along other questions I have asked before in past Jornal entries. I wrote a conversation they had today. It shocks me that I'm not fazed by this at all. Have I suddenly hit bottom? Have I completely turned crazy? _

_Nah, if I had I would be in a corner, blaming the world(even if it is it's fault) for where I am and how I came up to be.And not only that I would feel emotionless and had already killed somebody--_

_--but I hadn't..._

_So I'm not crazy...just...going through a strange faze in a teenager's life...? Right? Right,of course. Back to topic, here's Sora's and Silver's conversation:_

_**Sora:**Ms. Adam is aggravating, huh?_

_**Silver:**Yeah, I guess.She's always been when she used to be my homeroom teacher._

_**Sora:**She was your Homeroom teacher? Woah,man. Was it a resemblance to Hell?_

_**Silver(laughs):**Kinda. I gave her a hard time, truth be told._

_**Sora:**Oh. Good thing she's just my Algebra II teacher._

_**Silver(grunts):**Lucky you. Anyways, what's with her anyways?_

_**Sora(grummbles):**You know. The usual._

_**Silver:**Ole' Fart. You can tell me._

_**Sora:**Woow. "Ole' Fart", Riku? How old is that?_

_**Silver:**Old. What she do? Because you just brought her up when we were talking about what happened yesterday on The Game._

_**Sora:** Nothing. She's just that type you wanna kill ya know?_

_I guess what Sora said got to me. Does other people say that too? Does that mean anybody could kill anyone if they really wanted too...or is that just how they feel for the person? I can't imagine seeing Sora kill his teacher. It just doesn't fit his personality or character.Well, I guess if you looked at me I don't look like a madd smart, troubled girl who's interested in killing people and animals. In fact, I look quite normal actually(set aside my bruises and cuts I get from the Old Bitch) I look like your eveyday normie. _

I stared at what I wrote when I got off my stop. I blinked before I quicly put it away and ran up my front steps. I went in and called,"I'm here, Ol--I--I--I mean Granny!" If she caught me calling her such mean names I would be on the road somewhere--getting ready to get run over by Granny's run down Sudan.

"WHAT?0!"

I rolled my eyes as I walked into the living room. Granny sat in her chair, staring at the screen of the tv with a dirty scowl that never seems to leave her face.

"Granny?"

"My medication, child! I'll die without them!"

_Wish you would_, I thought as I kept my cool. Why couldn't I find the power to just let her lay and die?It just makes me so psst off that I can't find my guts to leave her medication alone. I bet they hate to enter her mouth anyways.But enough of that, I had an experiment to do. I can't go out tonight without permission. I went for her medicine and sat it on the arms of her chair. I stepped back and quickly asked,"May I go out?"

Granny's head snapped at me. I shook under her powerful glare. I can do it too. Just not to her.

"Why? You got a Strip Club job now?0! You little wr-"

I shook my head franticlly,"N-No ma'am. It's only 3:30 pm...I need to go out for class...an experiment." It wasn't entirely a lie, nor was it entirely true.But it was enough to help me get out of this hell hole.

Granny examined me to see if I would fall back and cry. She loves to see me crummble in her wrinkled hands. I learned that when I first slept in _her_ house.

"Ok. Go. You're distracting me-- BUT if you come here late I'll wring your neck."She turned back to the tv. I stared at her with a little shock. She bought it!

She felt my eyes and gave me a snarl,"Get out before I help you get out you little wrench!"

I stummbled back then quickly put the chemicals in my bag and ran out the house.

0o0o0o0o0o**X**0o0o0o0o0

**Y**ou know when you're 5 years old you see an antpile. You smile because you're bigger than those tiny ants. You step on one and kill it. This makes you go madd and excited so you step on another and another. You knew you could've left them alone but you knew you had that power. You were fate. You killed. And it was fun because they were worthless insects and no police will come after you just for killing over 50 rats. Everyone thinks it's worthless to arrest someone for killing an _ant_. That's what I felt like. I killed those rats. They were my ants. A policeman won't stop and put me in Holding for murdering a stinky rat. That would be stupid and pointless. So. I killed about 15 rats in 3 days. Blunt, eh? Unbelievable, huh?Today,I wanted to see which rat drowns first in water, beer, or gasoline.

_Heh...I am turning crazy._

Then tomorrow I'll hang a rat and leave the rat on someone's porch. Damn people with their happy lives. They need a little reality to check them out. I know reality. They don't. They deserve this. Maybe...

The rat in the gasoline cup drowned first. I looked at it and wrote the results in my jornal. This will be a little present for my Sora. He needs to wake up in reality too. I don't care if he has deep blue, intense eyes...or sunburnt hair...or..._or that his skin looks tone and--_

Kairi. Focus.

I snapped back in reality as the two left over rats drowned. I wrote these results down and grinned at my experiment. Good work Kairi Ishima. I stood to my feet and dumped the water rat and beer rat at two different front steps. Then I got on a bus. Stopped near Sora's house, turned two blocks and saw the bricktownhouse with the green door. I looked at the cup that held the drowned rat. I looked around. Noone was around. I'm well disguised in Granny's huge sweatshirt(she gave it to me because there's a burnt mark on it).I put the hood on and dumped the rat on his front door mat that happily said,"Welcome!"

I rolled my eyes as I quickly hid in the shadows.

0o0o0o0o**X**o0o0o0o0

_On the bus the next day:_

I heard Sora and Silver talk. I wrote the conversation down as Jornal Entry:#27 as they talked.

"Guess what I found on my mat this morning,"Sora said to Silver. Silver's platnium hair brought out his bored electrifying eyes,"What?"

"A dead rat."

Silver blinked before looking at Sora with a confused frown,"A_ what?_"

"A dead rat. It smelled like gasoline."

"Gasoline?"

"No, man. Apple juice."Sora replied sarcasticlly.

"Well then Sora. Who put it there?"

Sora became thoughtful,"Dunno. Dad says it could be some weirdo. Don'tcha think it's _wierd_? A dead rat with gasoline all over it? That's creepy."

"That's messed up."Silver then gasped,"Sora! You _finally_ got enemies!"

"No. I don't think I do. But seriously though. A _rat_. A dead rat that was soaked in _gasoline_ ... why was it in gasoline in the first place?"

"Duh Sora. Some pyscho drowned it in there. You know how crazy the world is out there."Silver grunted a little annoyed. Sora's stop came and he pulled on the handle. The bus stopped and Silver and him exited the bus, leaving me with a satisfied smile.

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**A/N:**_I told you it would be short. I give thanks to those who reviewed! Love yaw! I know that this story is sad but'cmon, It's supposed to be-until the end-or maybe not. It's angst after all, isn't it not? Anyways, Please **review!** I would greatly appreciate it. And I'm fixing my Plot for The Whole Truth. It'll be kinda fixed on with KH2 and Kh3! Woot! Yay!_

_**If you have any questions, review and ask! I'll answer it! Remember to R&R!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**_ So yeah, I'm doing a chappie...and I'm lovin' it! Do it do it._

**Kiko: **_Uh…I'm not even gonna ask what you just said._

**A/N:**_ Good, I don't wanna hear your mouth anyways! (turns and walks away.)_

**Kiko:**_ 0.o O…k…I'll say the dissy.

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**Disclaimer:_ Ravey doesn't even own her Nintendo DS—_**

_**Ravey: Yes I do!**_

_**Whatever. Hope yaw like this chappie of a poor, turning insane girl.**_

_**Ravey: (sighs dramatically)I don't own KH.

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**Ch.3 BIG Changes**

_**J**ournal Entry: 35_

_My kills are getting more and more better. If you may say. I…killed a cat once—and a dog. I hanged the dog…I know…it's…goreish…I can't imagine myself doing it either…I just…do it. The cat…I pushed in busy traffic. I killed over countless rats and mice. The world's better without them anyways…well…who said the world was the best. With ugly people inside it the world must be ugly too…But when I kill… I forget myself...I forget I'm weak…I forget I'm going crazy(which I gladly accept I am). I mean...I literally forget everything...I don't think I even think when I kill. It's like I'm brainless and it doesn't hit me when I kill…(except, probably the cat and dog.) But I've been thinking lately…it's time to get bigger. It's time to make fire._

I stared at my journal entry with a blank expression. It sounded…I don't know. You tell me how it sounds. I guess a little blunt. I know—I killed a cat and dog. It was my hardest kill but hey, who said life was easy? I don't think I made sense right then. I don't think I will _ever_ make sense. The kill, did however, make me puke and(I hate to admit) bed wet for two weeks. I couldn't really believe I did kill them until reality kicked in and I saw their lifeless bodies…I grew scared of myself and questioned myself for a while. Who am I _really…?_

It was easier to kill rats and mice. No one likes them. But to do a dog and cat—now _that_ shook me.

I grew more and more to myself. I relied on myself and I took consideration to Beyoncé's song, _Me, Myself & I._ I needed no one. I trusted no one. It's just me, myself and I. No one knows me better than myself…wait…I don't really know who I am yet…just a very troubled, insane girl, need of help—

_Hmph, as if._

So, day after day—I watch _him._ I watch to see if _he_ noticed that he was one of my victims. I had to be very sneaky. Many plans I thought up to get rid of him. I came up with absolutely—

—nothing.

Pathetic, huh? Well, I couldn't think of anything. I'm completely out of ideas. But other than paying attention to Sora, I looked around areas that were old, and out of use. Places that no one lived in. Places that were _there_ but never noticed or has been forgotten and useless. And to my surprise there was a lot of that. I need a building for my fire. Just old, buildings. And the buildings were kinda near where I lived. That would be easy. Besides, who's gonna lock up someone for burning down an empty, deserted, useless building?

**XXXoXXX**

_**D**ammit!_

I opened the door to my house with amazing speed. I closed it silently and turned fully around to look into the eyes of the Powerful Ole' Bitch.

_I—I was late…!_

"G—Granny—I—I'm sorry! I came home as fast as I could! I mean it! I was held back in after school stuff an—…"I stopped when she just smiled at me in a very foreign way. A smile I would thought could never exist on her face. The smile was warm and _lovingly…_and those words shouldn't be described on Granny.

I frowned, "Gr—Granny…?"

"Yes, dear?" She grinned to me.

My heart raced as my stomach lurched. This was not my Granny. Not my abusive, hateful Granny. This was another lady. There has to be an explanation for this.

"Medication! Granny! Don't—don't worry! I'll get it! Then you'll feel bett—."

"I already took it before you came home darling. Now relax and sit while I cook dinner." She left into the Kitchen, leaving me utterly confused and speechless. Was it the apocalypse? The End of The World was _here_? Already? Oh shit! No! This couldn't be happening! Maybe I'm daydreaming! Yeah! I am daydreaming!

I looked at my hands, my arms, legs, chest, face, hair—nothing was bruised. OK, so I'm not daydreaming. But this isn't _right_!

_Wait!_ Do I want to pass off an opportunity like _this_? Do I want to get the Ole' Bitch back or this new and sweet Granny…I'll go with Sweet New Granny. But first to see if she means this. If she stopped her abusive ways and finally loved me. Hey. Possibility.

I walked to the kitchen and looked to see Granny actually cooking. I didn't come in, "Granny….what are you making?"

I was waiting for a nasty snarl with a snappy remark like, "Food!" or "Poop", but none came. Instead, she giggled, "Mac-n-cheese. My specialty. Dear, why don't you take a shower?"

I frowned as my voice crackled, "W-With…c-cold…wa-water…?"

Granny looked at me as though I was crazy, "No! Why _cold_? Warm, dear. Warm. Now hurry. I still need to do that hair of yours."

I blinked before I felt the ends of my mouth rise. This was fake. It had to be. Why would she suddenly become nice, cook food, give a warm bath, and do my hair?

"Kairi! Hurry, child! Before I won't have time to do your hair." Granny fussed as she turned back to her food.

I almost fell back/ She didn't just—she—she _did_… she called me "Kairi". She called me by my _name_. The name I had _never_ heard fly out her mouth in this household. But here she is. She said it. She said it…that's overwhelming…

**OOOxOOO**

"**K**airi! Your hair is beautiful! How come we've never took you to the salon?"

Because you said it was ugly. But I didn't say that out loud. I was still suspicious. This whole thing didn't seem right. Nothing was making sense.

Looking up at Granny, I examined her face. Smiles and joyous eyes looked back. I only frowned at her.

"Kairi?" my Grandmother's face turned concerned, "what's wrong?"

I looked away and fiddled with my fingers and bit my bottom lip. Her being concerned over _me_? I didn't think that was possible.

"Kairi," she sounded like a worried mom, "tell me what's the matter."

I closed my eyes, "Y—yo—you…." I winced, ready for the dangerous and hurtful impacts and the dirty names. But nothing happened. I slowly opened my eyes to see her frowning towards me as if **I** hurt her feelings, "What makes you say that?"

Anger slowly seeped into my veins, "You—you should know."

Granny shook her head. Has she lost it?

I glared, "Why-why aren't you _doing_ anything yet?"

"Wha-huh?" she slowly asked.

You kn—know. Hit me-" I squeezed my eyes shut and winced again. Nothing happened. Instead, just silence. I opened my eyes as she rubbed her forehead, "I'm done with that, Kairi."

"How….How am I su-supposed to believe you?"

"Just look at you. You're shaking when I comb your hair, you wince after every sentence, you stutter in fear. And who exactly did that to you? Me. I made you like this. A cold, scared girl, and I'm ashamed of myself for ever doing that. You cry, you whimper, you scream, because of me. I was hurting you more than myself."

I scooted away, "So…that's it?"

She nodded, smiling, "I'm done. Plus, to gain your trust, tomorrow I'm getting you new clothes and a new bed with covers and fix that door."

I bit harder into my lip, "You know about that?"

"Sure. Anybody with eyes and sense would when a door hangs halfway down from the hinges…did you break it?"

_Who else? _"Yes…ma'am."

"Why?"

I was silent, and then I sighed.

"You felt trapped? Another reason why I'm stopping my abusiveness."

I was still unsure about this. I shouldn't trust her. I was Little Red Riding Hood while she was the wolf. Right?

"I understand. You can't trust me. I wouldn't trust me either. That's why I'll work hard to get your trust by buying you new clothes an-"

"You _can't _buy my trust." I snapped quietly.

"True. But I'll do everything in my power to make you trust me. Let's start today. I'm Emmy Donny, your Grandmother. What's _your_ name?"

I couldn't help but smile, "Kairi Mizuki Ishima."

What a beautiful name. Tomorrow we shop! How about that Kairi Mizuki Ishima?"

I slowly frowned then nodded unsurely, "Ok." I looked up to see she had her arms out to welcome in a hug. A warm and safe hug. A hug is something I never experienced, let alone anyone touching me. I went into it, feeling very awkward. Something still wasn't right.

**XXXoXXX**

_**2** WEEKS LATER…_

I found my winning building. It was an ancient looking building. Cobwebs everywhere, very old. No one lived there it was…_perfect._

My life seemed perfect. Better clothes, better things, food, movies. It was amazing! And I did all that stuff with Granny. The movies, I didn't care that other teenagers from my school saw us together and laughed, I was just happy enough to even be _inside_ a movie.. I trusted Granny now and some secure ness engulfed me around new Granny. I feel that I'm completely happy now.

But today, something didn't feel quite right. I felt something bad was gonna happen. I just did. I knew for _sure…_

I walked up the steps to my house and stopped to see a black, suede, Porché in front of our house. Staring at it, I raised an eyebrow. I opened the door and slipped inside, calling out, "Granny! I'm home!"

"Kairi!... Yeah…Kairi's my granddaughter I was telling you about over the phone." Granny said from the living room.

"Oh, really? Did I tell you that Kairi is a pretty name?" said another woman's voice, responding to Granny. Frowning, I came into the living room and saw Granny in her best attire and pulled up hair. Then there was a slender, beautiful blonde woman sitting beside her with paper in hand. I had a questioned look on my face, "What's going on?"

Granny grinned to me in a way _I _only know. It was her, "_don't say a word you brat,"_ public grin.

_That's when I felt a lump in my throat…_

"Come Kairi, dear. Sit," Granny patted on the empty seat beside her. I sat as I glanced from Granny to the Blonde Lady. She smiled, "You _really_ don't know what's going on?"

"No…" I replied quietly. I really didn't.

"Well…" she drawled cheerfully, "I'm Lapina—"

"Call her Ms. Lapina, Kairi," Granny said, giving my leg a hard squeeze. She looked at me to see what my reaction is. I just put on my best "everything's fine" smile.

"It doesn't matter. I'm Lapina Arnold and your Granny, here, wants to rent a place in my Mansion Townhouse."

I blinked as my brain started to move and pump to life. I was putting a puzzle together, and I was slowly making sense of it. Mansion—Granny renting a room in that Mansion…

"I wanted to meet your Grandmother and see if she was taking good care of you and responsible enough to even take part in my mansion. Respecting you, loving you, full custody of you which I found is right. You know, like a mother taking good care of a daughter."

I held back my shocked face. I put the last piece of the puzzle in and the picture showed, _"cheated"_. She **_tricked_** me! She only did all of this to win my trust so that I could look presentable to this—this—lady! She did all that for herself, not me. And I was led to believe she cared when yet she was planning to live in a townhouse mansion—

"I'm usually on business trips. I do need renters and here she is! Almost—I just need to speak with you Kairi." Lapina looked to me with a warm, polite smile. Very rehearsed, very charming, and very busy.

"Do you get treated right from your Granny?" she asked. I felt like I was being interviewed for a job. I turned to Granny. She just smiled. She _knew_ I wouldn't rat her out even if I figured out her selfish plan.

I frowned to Lapina which probably, to her, was a fake, weary smile. Then I replied without thinking, "Yes."

"OK," she jotted notes down. She didn't look up, "Does she abuse you in any way?"

Yea. Mentally, physically, socially, and spiritually—"No. Never."

Lapina grinned, "Do you love her?"

My breath was clogged in my throat before I answered with a choaky, but perky voice, "Of course!"

**OOOxOOO**

**S**hoot me. Shoot me, shoot me, and shoot me. Now. So that I **_know_** I'm still alive and awake and in my senses. Someone grab a rifle or 95 kg gun and shoot me. I looked back at the limo with Winston in it. Our _new_ limo driver. But he just drove me to school and then I will take the bus home and to school for now on. Winston did a small wave when I gave him my frown. He pointed to the building like I was retarded. I nodded but did not budge. He sighed then turned down his tinted window, "Ms. Ishima…what is the matter?"

I looked to my new Highschool, it looked no different from my old one, "I…it's nothing. You can go Winston…"

He drove away and I didn't look away from the back of the limo until it vanished behind other cars. I swore before I finally took my first step on the land of Sora's school.

**XXXoXXX**

**"H**ey! I'm Selphie G. Just Selphie G.!" she grinned, "But you can call me 'Selphie', everyone else does!"

I frowned. She was so…happy.

It was annoying.

"Ill show you around. Let's see your schedule…" She took my paper/map/agenda/schedule thingy from me and skimmed through it. It took me some time to look at her. She dressed happy too. A long and slim dress like shirt that was yellow, fitted her giddy attitude. Light blue jeans flared at the end, covering half of her sandaled feet. She wore bangles that were gold. Her face was soft and she was a brunette.

"You have 3 classes with me and a lot with a friend I know. He's cool and nice. I'm sure he could help you around here when I'm not around—oh! I'm so rude! What's your name again?" Selphie looked up at me as her light emerald eyes caught me off guard…weird thing is they're not contacts…

I tried to smile back but I didn't do it. It was more like a shy grin, "I'm…Kairi…Kairi Ishima."

"Oh! I'm so jealous! That's a pretty name! What's your middle name?"

"Um…Mizuki…"

"Kairi Mizuki Ishima? That's so pretty! You're pretty too! Like I always say. Pretty names belong to pretty people!" She gave me my packet or book thing back and led me to homeroom. I was thinking about what she said. I wasn't pretty. I look at the mirror and curse at it. I don't like what I see. I think I crashed it and threw it out. Why do I want to see how ugly I look everyday when I go to bed or wake up in the morning? I'm sure Selphie just said that because she had to say it or something.

We were walking to homeroom, a class we shared. She entered and I followed, very shyly. I never been a new student…

She stood before the rowdy class. I was use to that. I would usually drown into the noise. Invisible to the world.

She then cleared her throat loudly as the class quieted down. Our teacher which was a blonde dude with a toothpick in his mouth, carelessly read his newspaper.

"This is our new classmate! Kairi Mizuki Ishima—"

"You look _purrty_!" a clown slurred, followed by a few laughs and snickers. I frowned and looked down. He was lying—I knew it.

"Like I was _saying_ before I was **_brutally_** interrupted," Selphie continued, glaring at the class, "This is Kairi. Treat her nicely. Don't rape her, no touching and no molesters!"

I gaped at her. The girls of the class giggled. I looked down again, slightly shifting from side to side but stopped, knowing people saw me. People were _staring_ at me. What were they thinking? Did they think I was weird? Too shy? An nerd? Or…did they see right through me? Could they see the girl who loved fires and dead rats? Who liked to stalk boys and know them so well without talking to them? Did they see who I really am without me knowing who I was?

Selphie continued talking about my respect, still entertaining the class. She was gifted. I hated that already about her. How can she stand there laughing and joking with a carefree attitude, knowing the world out there is shit? Trust no one and love yourself always….well…I don't particularly love myself. I don't like myself. So forget I said that.

After thinking that of Selphie I had an attitude…a bad one.

_Note to self:_

_Put Selphie under the "I hate" list with Sora and Granny. I think Sora hates Granny anyways. Having their names next to each other seemed to snarl at one another. Selphie will accompany them and Sora would be relieved…if he doesn't hate over hyper girls._

"Kairi, eh?" the teacher asked as her stood. He looked me over. I wasn't in the mood as I glared at him. He narrowed his eyes, "Sit next to Selphie in the back so that she can explain to you how this school works."

We obeyed. We passed jocks, blondes, nerds,(which were way in the front) wannabes, populars, cool people, and across the room corner was the druggies. Hello everyday cliques of regular Highschool.

We sat in two lone desks. Selphie rambled on about teachers, the school and kids that I had no idea of who they were.

"That's Mr. Cid, our homeroom teach. But he wants us to call him 'Cid'. He said he was an engineerer or something like that so he teaches…he teaches…well—I don't pay much attention in his class. He doesn't teach us though. Just sits around," Selphie ranted on. I wanted so desperately to shut her up. I sighed dramatically and looked at the popular kids who sat two rows ahead of us. Cool Kids behind them.

"Oh. Those are my friends," Selphie said. I didn't turn to her. She continued anyways, "That's Tidus, and Wakka. Tifa's in Sora's homeroom, Yuffie is with Riku in another class and Aerith and Cloud are higher in grade. We all share the same lunch hour, you can sit with us!"

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**A/N:**_ Okay! That was the longest chapter for this story YET! I hope yaw likes! Becuase my arm hurts from typing it.REVIEW! The desperate purple button wants to be clicked! Do as it says! Thankx to those who reviewed! Luv ya!_


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:**_FIRE! YAY! FIRE! I'm so sorry if I haven't updated every other time being…wait…I'm sorry for being lazy. I mean I had tests and projects on my ass and whenever I got home I just don't feel in the mood to type my arms out. So I'm sorry again…still…FIRE!

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**Disclaimer: _Fire doesn't belong to me. The cavemen invented—well—discovered it so it's theirs…I guess…

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**_Ch. 4 Fire pt.I_**

He's in 5 of my 8 classes. Five, three with Selphie like she said. Well…there goes my invisibility. I followed Selphie anyway to my classes. I didn't feel right in these halls. I felt I was walking in Sora's territory. In his classes I hid behind my books. At lunch when Selphie waved and called out my name I acted I didn't see or hear her. I walked on, walking to a table that was fitted for a circle of friends. It was empty. It was my shield. I knew Sora saw. I knew he watched. Either way I hid my face behind my hair. I bit into my sandwich I brought from Lapina's house that I now live in. She's in China for business purposes or something of that sort.

"Hey, Kairi, right? That's your name isn't it?"

I froze, my eyes widened. _He_ came to _me_. Or Selphie probably forced him to get me. I shuddered.

He sat beside me, "Well…um…"

I can imagine him fidgeting, uncomfortable by this loner girl. I can see him scratching his neck, turning his head to where his friends sat with a frown across his face. I knew because I knew him. I didn't need to look at him at all…

"So…you're that same girl from my afternoon bus?" He asked nervously.

I blinked as my heart skipped and my stomach tightened. I needed to get away. I didn't know he noticed me…better yet know I even existed.

"In fact…you're in 5 of my classes. That's pretty cool. Selphie told me about you. She says you're nice." I heard him shift a little, "She's annoying, huh?"

I slightly looked up at him. He had a soft, safe smile across his face. I held back and did a small nod.

His smile grew wider, "Heh heh! I knew I wasn't the only one who thought so. But you'll get use to Selphie's hyper drive."

"Really now?" I asked, taking another bite of my sandwich.

He lessened his smile to a relieved grin, "She talks! For a second I thought I was talking to a mute girl or something. Are you lonely? You know you can sit with us. No one likes to be alone."

"I do," I was kinda startled that I came back with a cold remark.

He frowned, "Really…?"

I nodded, not looking at him but only my sandwich.

"Oh…well…it just seemed you were sad or upset about something where I sat." He looked at me closely as I felt awfully awkward under his sapphire eyes. Was he reading me? Did he see _me_? My killer side?

_Killer…that word…_

Sora then smiled a little, "Do…do you want me to go? I will…if you want me to. But if you really need anyone to talk to—I'm here. I'm an— "

--easygoing guy. I know.

"—easygoing guy. Not to brag but—" He smirked and tugged down his blue jacket, "I'm very easy to talk to." He then glared to his table and muttered, "…better that Riku anyway."

"Riku?" Damn my curiosity.

"Yea. He's my best bud. He's sitting over there at my table next to my other friend Tifa—the girl with the long black hair. He has silver hair, can't miss him." Oh…Silver—erm…I mean…Riku. That's his name…Riku. You know? He looks more charming afar.

"So? You wanna meet 'em?" he asked, looking to me with his dazzling blue eyes. Better than mine I might add.

"Or…we can wait 'till you get a better feel of this school."

I nodded to his second suggestion as he did an understanding nod and walked back to his table. I stared after him and thought about what it would be like in his shoes. A normal, picture perfect life…a mom who's there to take care of you and a dad who plays catch with you and gives you money when you ask for it…a sister or a brother…would I be like him? Sane? Normal? My mom…she's…let's just say she's in sales, sexual sales…sales to get money and spend it immediately on drugs…and my dad…wherever the hell he is…is out there somewhere...maybe one of her delusional customers, but that doesn't matter. We're too different, we live in two different world within one earth…he can't possible get too close or even be associating with me…but why did he?

**XXXoXXX**

I still took the same bus to the house with Sora, but now in afternoons and mornings. I tried to avoid his group of friends and still get to the bus stop. Guess what. It didn't work.

"HEY KAIRI!"

I jumped and slowly looked behind my shoulder to find Sora with the biggest smile in the world (that I've ever seen, truth be told.)

I frowned at him, "Must you shout and gain _so_ much attention—" he gained that attention even without shouting it. He's popular. He has that unknowing aura about him that makes him powerful.

I looked away.

"Yea!" he exclaimed, answering my question, grinning like an excited little boy, "do it all the time!"

I frowned some more, "Why so excited and cheerful…did…did Selphie rub off on you?" I was completely serious too.

He laughed. His laugh just made me fluster and some burden lifted off my shoulders. Why? I can't answer that.

"No. I'm just glad someone from my school rides bus 15." He said practically jumping up and down. He stopped and smirked at me, "I'm even _more_ satisfied that it's a _girl_."

I felt my cheeks warmed and I rubbed them, like I could actually rub the blush off of my face. Never hurts to try. The oh so powerful boy that I'm _supposed_ to hate is hitting on me. Does that happen normally out there?

Sora looked at me with question, "What're you doing?"

I stopped to see I was angrily rubbing my face. I flushed, "Well…I…um…"

To my delight, the bus came and I jumped in, putting my bus fare in the box thingy and sat in my usual seat. Sora sat beside me and I stared at him. He looked back at me before saying, "Oh! Why am I sitting beside you is what that scary look on your face is asking me?"

I bit my tongue to stop me from giggling which I _never_ do. Aura people. His _aura_. But I nodded to his question. He nodded too with understandment, "But I've noticed you sit here all the time. All alone. I don't think you like to be alone like you say you do."

"I do." I retorted.

"Surrre," he drawled with a roll of his eyes, "Well I don't. Sitting on this boring bus, being bored, and being bored _alone_ is…well…boring. Aren't you bored being alone."

I looked out the window before answering calmly, "Nope."

"You don't?"

"No. I like being alone."

"Why?"

"Because…I'm not like you. You like to be in the crowd…I want to be away from it."

"I understand that but what makes you like being alone?"

Some feeling wanted me to pour my dreadful story on him. I felt I couldn't lie, but another part of me said to not tell him anything at all. So I answered simply with a, "You can never disappoint yourself." It wasn't a lie either. Sora looked completely confused and bewildered. He _is_ simpleminded isn't he, yeah?

He didn't reply except making noise by smacking on some _Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum_. I grimaced every time a smack came from his mouth. I don't like smacking at all.

"Sora?"

"Mmm? _Smack._"

"Stop smacking."

He frowned at me with a small pout before saying, "Sorry," and chewed silently. His stop came (thank God!) and he got up. Before he stepped off he grinned to me and said, "BYE KAIRI!"

I felt hot and hid in the safety of my seat. I watched him walk off home as I turned to my window, looking at nothing in particular. Today, after I get off this stop, will be an important. The day I set fire to my pick of a building.

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**A/n: **_It wasn't supposed to stop there…but I had to do just that because my arms are tired and such so R&R. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!_


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: **_Second story I'm updating. I'm updating 3 stories in one day! Am I able to do it? Can I do it? I believe I can! Yessssssssss. Alright, I updated The Dance story and a new story Lake Oblivion with Olette as the main character; I also updated Stardom so I'm crazy because I'm updating A LOT. WOOOT! I bet you guys are __enjoying_

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**Disclaimer: _Alright, I don't own KH, fire, or the book that inspired me to do this. It was in someone else's point of view but I was like, "Wouldn't it be interesting to put it through the crazy person's POV?" Thus, the birth of this angst fic. Go meh…I'm such a happy person writing depressing stories…hmmm… _**

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_**Ch.5 Fire pt.II**_

**I **walked to my new house and stared at it. It's very big mind you. I frowned before shifting a little. What new horrendous things Granny could use to hurt me.

"Why don't you go in?"

The voice held a scary power. A power to use for danger and sneaky ambitions, the voice was raspy and cold. I turned to see a girl who looked to be 17 going on 18 with a black jacket on, a red X was spray painted uniquely on the back of it.

Gang related perhaps…

"Who are you?"

"Larxene."

Weird name, I guess it was her gang name. Yet, it had a weird danger ring to it. Her power was extremely high, higher than mines.

She needed no confidence.

The blonde smirked, "Well? Why hesitate to enter your own house?" She whistled at it, "It sure is a looker. I didn't think you lived there—or anyone at all."

"What do you want?"

She gave a curt grin; hiding things that I needed to know but was not sure I wanted to know. She flipped her short hair, "Oh, you were so shy at school. Where did this cold voice come from?"

"You haven't answered my question." My way of thinking may be complex but if I were to make sure no body understand my true self and intentions I must speak simple and not go beyond anything like to a conversation.

"Neither have you," she said her "neither"s with a "Nye". So it sounded like something British or high class rich people would say way back in the day.

She continued, "I've been watching you Kairi Ishima. I'm quite fond of you. You look like every other girl, but I see through that. I see you're hiding something about you that can twist your world into something no one can ever reach."

"I don't have time for this." I went up the stairs and fumbled for my keys, turning the ignition to get in.

"Would you go to your Granny or do what you've been trying to do for a long while now?" she snickered as I slipped into the dark house, shaken. Before I had got in I heard her say, "If you want to talk to someone who _does_ and _can_ understand you. I'm here."

She knows a bit too much but how…?

I stood up straight. The house was empty. Thing with Ms. Lapina is she _trusts_ us to keep up with the mansion—to save money of course. All rich people are pathetically the same, always about the business and money. The maids and butlers come when she comes back. Granny and I—mainly just I—keep up with the house. It was cold and dark inside. I shuddered, "Granny…I'm home!"

Like a ghost she suddenly appeared from a hallway. Her steps echoed. I froze when she finally came to me. Her face was plain and flat. I looked down. My heart picked up speed. Something was going to happen.

She grabbed my arm with such strength, I winced. She dragged me to the kitchen and I saw that the oven was on; all the fire was turned up high with no pots or pans over it. My eyes grew wider as I dug my heels into the ground, "No! I'm sorry Granny! I'm sorry! Don't! Please!"

"Kairi."

I looked at her, still shocked but feared because she calmly said my name.

"I know that you like fire," her words were flat, her face emotionless, I shivered.

"Why is that?"

I didn't answer. How could she possibly know about my fire interests? She then shrilled, "WHY!?"

I jumped, my eyes bouncing frantically around the room for an exit. Her grasp on me was hard to get free from. My bouncing eyes lay on the fire in front of us, I grew more panicked.

"You won't answer me? Then…well see just how much you like the fire," She grabbed my other arm and picked me—she is very strong—and carried me to the oven. I flailed around, knowing what she was going to do. She was going to burn me. She then adjusted me like a weight, holding me over the fire. Someone started to scream. I realized it was me, and my scream scared me that I screamed even harder. She was in front of the oven, tuning me out.

She lowered me some more.

I flailed around, yelling, screaming, shouting, kicking for dear life—

--wait…my life is shit.

Doesn't mean I want to die though. I felt hot, heavy, wet tears run down my cheeks as I begged her, "N—NO! GRANNY! G-GRANNY! I'M SORRY! I'M SORRY! The flames were crawling on my back, tickling harshly, tickling so hard that it hurt. I felt that I had to do something because Granny wasn't going to let me go. I knew that much.

The flames were eating away at my bare back, the heat making me jerk around to get free. I kicked her and I felt cool air brush my back. I scrambled up, falling and tumbling to get to the exit. I got my balance back as I ran out into the hallway. I was slipping, falling, getting back up and running again. I ran upstairs while Granny came after me. This scared me even more. I ran to my room, which was near the back of the house. I slipped in, slammed the door shut and locked it. I was wheezing, while watching the door carefully, my hands trembling. I couldn't stop shaking.

_BAM!_

My head jolted up, staring at the very thing that kept me and the Ole' Bitch separate. I fell back, not leaving the sight of the door.

_Bang, Bang! _"Bitch! Open this door!"

My eyes shook, correction, my entire body shook. I had to leave. I had to. I grabbed my bag, stuffed deodorant, my camera, folder of pictures and my journal.

"WENCH! When I get in there you, are, DEAD!"

I began to hyperventilate, throwing random stuff into the bag. I put my jug of oil (don't ask where I got it from) and my matches in the bag. It was a huge gym bag if you must know.

Granny was now using something to slam against the door. I looked to the door then to the only window in the room. I quickly jolted to it, fumbling to get it open. I climbed out and thanked God there was a tree to help me climb down. I jumped unto the branch and held on to the trunk. Get down Kairi. Do you want to stay with the Wicked With of the Oldies or break an ankle?

I jumped down without thinking about the answer.

I then left out from behind the house and out to the front of it. Standing on the curb across the street was Larxene. She grinned curtly towards me as I unwillingly walked over to her. When I got to her she smirked then said, "Ah…I knew you would leave."

"I'm coming back…" I whispered, "I've ran off like this before."

"An old bitch isn't she?" Larxene tilted her head to Lapina's home, "I heard you screaming like she was going to murder you." She then looked at me, " She was…wasn't she?"

I kept quiet.

Larxene shrugged it off, "Don't worry. I know how you feel—."

"You can't possibly know how I feel…" I grunted. My voice was somehow cool and collected but my hands still had a problem, it was still shaking.

Larxene gave an understanding noise, "I know that you'd rather sleep on a _bed_ than in a cardboard box until your Granny calms down. That sort of thing happens to me. My mom's an ass—does what your Granny does. So I leave—don't come back 'till she forgets about or whenever I calm down and feel like going back." She looked down the street, "It's like…you want to kill them so badly but you're afraid to…why…?"

I frowned. Larxene and I (even though I don't want to admit it) share something in common…

Confusion and anger…

She stood and started to walk. I followed, "Are you on the run now?"

"Mother dearest isn't home, and I don't know when she _will_ come home. So yeah, you can say that."

"What happens if she catches you?"

"Uh…" Larxene turned a corner, "Don't know." She looked at my back, "Care to cover up that? Once we get to my place I'll put an ointment on it." She stopped, "Wait—." She turned to me, "What are you doing tonight?"

"Business."

"Oh, I know what it is. You're making fire."

**X0X**

"**F**ew words of advice, when you exit the burning building, go out the back, exit on another street—then come back here." Larxene sat calmly on a thrown out chair.

I rolled my eyes, "I know. I thought of everything."

"Even where to start the fire?"

I shook my head, "Nope."

"Smart ass," Larxene gave me a respectable smirk before adding, "Need any help?"

"I work alone."

"An emo loner! Oh! My favorite!"

"I'm not emo…whatever. I'll be back."

"And I'll be awaiting your return."

I didn't respond as I entered my old, un-used, house that I choose. It was damp and musty inside. Dust bunnies sat in corners, cob webs hung everywhere. I already didn't like it here. I walked through it, getting caught in the cob webs. I swung and rubbed myself. Don't you just _hate_ that? Strings--invisible ones--hanging on you. You feel it—you just can't see it.

"Can't wait until I drop that match too…" I muttered as I pulled my hair in a ponytail and putt on latex gloves (I want to be careful), climbing the steps. I went in each room, pouring the oil in it each, and then I trailed it all into the hallway, downstairs, then in the living room to the kitchen. I stopped and took out my box of matches. I held it, not doing anything before I sighed and set flame to the small match.

The fire made me reminisce about my attack an hour ago. The fire burned brightly as I saw my horror in it. I saw Granny holding me over that oven. I dropped the match like it was poison to my skin. I watched it as flames rose where ever the oil laid and I ran out the back, running on a new street, and then walking back to the street Larxene waited patiently on.

"Hello. Isn't it a beaut?" the blonde asked.

I looked at the flaming house as I felt that rising power over me again. _I_ caused that fire. After a few minutes a crowd formed then a TV reporter, police cars, and fire trucks.

Larxene and I sat back as I wrote my analysis in my journal. I did the estimation of the people, about two police cars, one fire truck and two news reporter vans. And _I_ got the power to call forth them all with using only an element. It brought a smile to my lips. Then a new challenge came to mind. Can I get _more_ people to come, _more _police cars and fire trucks? Can I get more attention?

_Can I get even bigger?_

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**A/N: **_Yay! Awesome! I finished! I'M GREAT! WOOOOOOOOOT! R&R please and thank you!_

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**Special Thanks to those who reviewed:**

(So many to acknowledge so let's go straight to answering your replies)

**Shese:** Thank you, I try.

**Sheik101:** _At least you're a constant reviewer._

**IceBlueWings:** Woot, yeah, the story was meant to make you feel sorry for her…thanks for reviewing!

**EraTomo:** Yes, woo is Kairi…

**VIII:** Yay, I updated right? Well…not so soon but I updated!

**Kyoto-Chan:** Yes, poor Crazy Kairi…Thanks for putting it on your favs! Uhm, she moved but she moved closer in his school district and Silver is Riku.

**Michelle:** U crazy butt, why must u harass me?

**Jka1:** I try to make all my stories odd enough so that people can read. My job is to type and everyone else is to review. See, I like reviews and I need them to keep me typing off my arms. Thanks for the review.

**Jaime Synder:** She is a bitch. I can't tell about the murder of anybody at this point of the story. LOL, I updated and I do appreciate your review.

**OkikusWellxx:** I love writing it because I have to pretend to be that depressing maniacal person. Go meh and my genius! Thank you for reviewing!

_**Evil Genius of the COCA:**_ Aww…I don't want people to die but It's not for me to say. Just keep reading and find out.

_**Kingdomfantasyanime453:**_ Interesting guess, but I doubt that will happen…

_**xx-Tragic-Serenadexx:**_ I had a problem with the killing the dog and cat too but this is about Kairi becoming a murderer so…

_**

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_**R&R!!! PLEASE AND THANK YOU! I LURVE YAW!**_


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** _If one was to claim too much then what is left to the rest?

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**Ch. 6 Project Affair**

**I**f I wasn't so angry or had it so bad in this world I would've declined.

However, I sat beside Larxene, hacking on a cigarette as she calmly dragged on hers. We had come back from the fire scene with silence. We had not exchanged looks nor had we exchanged words of acknowledgement to the others existence. We walked mute.

When we entered the run down abandoned house I was apprehensive. Larxene then took notice of me, "Don't worry. They won't bother you."

I wasn't so sure but I kept quiet and followed her inside. The place was dark and damp. Larxene then pulled out a cigarette and offered me one. Without any hesitation I took it.

Now I'm hacking up my lungs.

Larxene seemed at ease and relaxed before trusting me with her life story. At the tender age of 10 her father died. Her mother somewhat blamed the death of her husband on her daughter. _Why_ was the question I asked between coughs. Larxene shrugged, "He died after Thanksgiving, shopping for Christmas presents. He was tired and slept at the wheel, crashing into a tree. Mother dearest blamed me because I wanted a rare toy among stores and Dad had to search all day for it. When I did get the present I couldn't look at it without feeling guilt so I just threw it out. So in a way I did believe her that I killed my father but that wasn't the case. I know now it was nobody's fault but fates. My mother has yet to learn that. So when everything was taken away from us I got the brute of her outbursts, frustrations, and violence."

She rubbed her neck, blowing out an "O" of smoke from her lips.

"Yep, that's how it happened. My mother hates me. Anyways, I was angry with the world and all its inhabitants; cursing it and everybody whose life was picture perfect. That's when Xemnas came to my rescue. You notice how our names have x's in it? He rearranged our names so my real name is Arlene." She shuddered a moment, "I like Larxene better don't you?"

"I don't care."

Larxene giggled, "I took it you wouldn't. Anyhow you can have my bed for the time being. I'm pretty sure you wouldn't want to borrow any of the other members' beds, especially since they're all men."

"You're the only female?"

"Ah-huh, it's the first room on the left when you go upstairs."

"Whatever," I hacked on another drag, feeling somewhat air headed. Larxene raised an eyebrow at me as she smashed her cigarette down, "I'm going to get some water for you…you look absolutely ridiculous."

I started to laugh at nothing.

"You're high. How funny." Larxene left me there as I saw the room swirl into exhilarating colors that seemed like the inside of a lava lamp. I tried to touch it while I floated in mid-air. I don't know why but everything was funny and entertaining. I heard squirrel like voices all over before I saw Sora looking down at me with his beautiful sapphire eyes. He grinned, picking me up bridal style and carrying me up a rainbow of fuzz and bunnies. He then sat me down in a pink box before saying, "Isn't this pathetic?"

"Hahahahaha, wha—what?"

"This is sad. Larxene, why did you give the kid a cigarette? Then you leave her alone in a room of weapons. Sometimes I wonder how intelligent you really are."

"Shut up Axel you dumb ass."

I felt a shower of sheer cold water fall over me as my happy world disappeared. I found myself in a tub, soaked and shivering. The colors still lingered and I still felt airy but I was aware of things a bit better. I looked up with shattering teeth to see a red haired man with crazy lime green colored eyes that stared down expectantly at me. He was very skinny while Larxene knelt down next to the tub, looking at me with a glass of water in her hand, "Want it still?"

"_N-n-n-n-n-noooo_."

"Ok. Clothes are on my bed." Her face held no concern as she stood leaving me there with this guy. The long, red haired male and his conspicuous eyes gave a snort before helping me out of the tub, "Name's Axel, got it memorized?"

"Sure…" I was shaking a lot still as the colors slowly began to recollect it self. I hurried to Larxene's room, locking the door. It was red and black decorated. Skulls were on every other thing. I frowned, not at all comfortable. Sure I was a bit demented but not gothic to this point. I put on the red top and black, tight pants. I scrunched up my face as I lay on the bed, deciding not to leave this room until morning break.

**OxO**

**L**arxene had disappeared.

I thought less of her when Axel told me this. I decided not to make a scene of it, leaving the place and heading to a bus stop. Waiting for the bus I thought about how bad Larxene did have it. I felt a little reassured that I wasn't the only human on this planet going through mess.

I climbed on the bus and rode to school with my bags. It was an amusing sight to be the center of attention. I was still in Larxene's dark attire. Why hadn't I changed was beyond me but I didn't feel like going to the bathroom to change either.

I entered class after putting my gigantic bag in my locker. There were few teens inside as I sat next to Selphie. She grinned as acknowledgment as I nodded silently. Selphie then took notice of my wardrobe, "…The Goth look today Kai?"

I blinked at her nickname for me before taking a minute to answer, "Well…this is a friend of mine…she let me borrow it since someone stole my clothes when I went over to her house to sleep over…"

"Um…ok…" Selphie gave me a concerned grin before turning to the front. She just earned herself a check beside her name on my list.

**OxO**

**I** will never forgive Ms. Luna ever again.

She's my language arts teacher who announced to the entire class we had a project. It was bizarre, the topic anyways. We were reading a book on a murderer's mindset, his diary. She wanted us to make a skit of an investigation of a murder. We will be grouped in pairs. One person would be the investigator and the other the murderer. We could make up the case, be creative, have fun, as long as it doesn't have nude and it has to deal with murder.

I find that this whole thing was quite ironic.

As she called out names I sighed to myself miserably. I wasn't one who favored "Group" or "partner" projects because I always end up doing all the work. In a way I don't care as much because then I know the project will be an easy perfect A .Today, hearing about a project when I just attended this school only but yesterday was irritating at the most.

"…Aimee Swartz and Boston Shams…Tony Rick and Nita Samuel…Sora Hitoshi and—" Ms. Luna recited from her paper nonchalantly despite some teens' groans and complaints.

I rested my head in the lap of my enveloped arms before I heard her say my name. I blinked, slightly lifting my head up, "Yes?"

The class looked to me. I felt Sora's eyes amongst them. My cheeks warmed. Ms. Luna raised an eyebrow, "Sora Hitoshi and Kairi Ishima."

…

What?

Wait a minute…no way…you've _got_ to be kidding me…

"We're partners?"

"Yes Ms. Ishima."

"Why?"

"Because that's how I want it Ms. Ishima."

"But…I don't do well in group or partner projects."

"Then that's great. Mr. Hitoshi here will be the perfect partner. He's very cooperative."

"I do much better on my own…not to be rue Sora."

"…Um…ok…"

"Ms. Ishima, I will not allow you to interrupt class because you can't get your way. I understand that you're new here but I expect for somebody to be in Honors Language Arts to understand that such behaviors such as your own is not permitted. On your own volition I suspect that you take Mr. Hitoshi and not argue with me do I make my self clear?"

Ms. Luna has earned herself a spot on my list.

"Do I make myself clear Ms. Ishima?"

"Yes…"

"Good. Now…Lily Black and Corey Edams…"

Sora came towards me after class with a small grin, "So…partner…have any ideas for the project?"

I fiddled with the smooth exterior of the pants I wore. Sora took notice, blinking, "Um…I never took you to be…well…that is…hm…"

"They're my friend's."

"Oh…ok. Well any ideas?"

My eyes looked to the side and thought for a while. Something clicked on to me immediately, a side that was very similar to the side I evolve into when I kill. I gave Sora a smug look, "Stalker."

"What?"

"A stalker. I'll be the murderer of course. Who would suspect a female as a killer? Anyways, I'll be the serial killer who stalks her very victim. You, the investigator find the victim's dismembered body in a suitcase…well…the disembodied head at shore. This is a solid kill because the killer was very smart of how to handle the death, the body and the clues that can give her away. Thing is…she's an investigator too, working in the same case as you." I stopped, touching my lips softly in thought, "It sounds interesting enough…"

Sora gave me an impressed smile, "That's…wow…I would've never thought of that...So…how about you come over to my place today? Will that be ok? I can drive you back home."

I was a little taken aback. I was _never_ invited to anybody's house let alone a boy's but it would be thought of smart to go over to his place, get a plan on how to execute the idea, make up scripts, and other stuff. It would only be dangerous to go to Granny so soon. Hopefully I could just make Sora drop me off at a stranger's house and get home on my own alone. That way Granny won't bring up questions.

"O—okay…"

"Great! Just get off the stop with me and I'll show you the way to my place."

Heh…if only you knew…

"Of course. I think our project will be remembered quite well."

Sora gave me his handsome smile, "Yup. See you Kairi."

At that, he left.

**XoX**

**I**t was cold in his house.

The entire time while coming over here he was fretting and asking me if it was okay with my family that I could come over without telling them where I will be and such. I nodded every time he asked, "Its ok…don't worry so much."

He went off to turn on the heater. Even though it was cold I felt somewhat secured and warm inside. I swallowed as I took the audacity to take off my shoes and enter their living room. As soon as I sat down I heard the soft roar of the heater turn on and a heavy sigh from behind me.

"My father would rather have us freeze to death than turn the heater on." He muttered taking out some paper and setting it on the coffee table in front of me. I sat on the floor to its level, "Your father thinks it costs too much?"

"Of course. A lot of dads do I realized. So I wrote from what I remember you said in the hallway. Is this alright?" He handed me the paper and I read. I nodded, "Yup."

"Ahh, 2 minutes in here and I'm already bored. TV?"

"Sora…you bought me over here to work not waste our time procrastinating."

Sora gave me a pout, his eyes deeper the skies themselves…ugh…I need to go puke.

And no, I'm not in denial.

"C'mon Kairi, don't be a sour puss. Live life and be fun. We have a lot of time anyways."

I crossed my eyes, "I think I need to go…"

"_Kai_, _please_?" his lip poked out farther, "I'll give you a bunch of chocolates and kisses."

"Ugh, _fine_…but promise me we'll do some work between commercials. And don't_ dare_ give me any kisses…chocolates will do."

Sora smiled and agreed. We ended up watching Tom and Jerry on Boomerang while we popped kisses into our mouths. The Hershey kisses that is. It felt…bizarre…sitting beside the guy I'm supposed to loathe and that I want to kill just because his life is "picture" perfect but here I am sharing kisses with him, chuckling every now and then at the idiocy and boyish charm he had for cartoons.

"You know what's funny?"

"What?"

"People talk about how deadly and violent cartoons of today are but back then they used ironing boards to flatten you. I think common household products that is easily accessible for anybody is more dangerous than a gun you most likely won't have in your house," Sora stuffed his mouth with the chocolate as I sat quietly, staring at him.

He blinked and turned my way, "I'm right aren't I?"

I looked away, "I…I couldn't agree with you more…"

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**A/N:**_ THNX TO THOSE WHO FLIPPIN REVIEWED! I LOOOOVE YOU GUYSSS! GESS WHAT! I HAVE A DEVIANTART PAGE. IT SUX! XP_

_Nah…once I have the right materials my artwork shall be the BOMB!_

_R&&R!_

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**_Anon review reply:_**

ValorKairi:_ Thnx for the review my dear friend! I really appreciate it. Hoped you enjoyed this chappie_


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:**** I will be shot if I said I owned Kingdom Hearts. An unfinished story is the most tragic of storytelling tragedies.**

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**Ch.****7 Naminé Arnold**

**I** finally made it to my house. Sora did drop me off 5 blocks away from my house in his dad's car. Thinking about the animated scene made me create a reluctant smile on my face...

"_Sora, if you're going to invite me to your home to work...then we need to work okay? Next time if you invite me over I'll only come if it's project intended...alright?" I scolded as I gathered my things together._

_Sora stood with a hearty laugh, "Sure, no problem Kairi. But...see..." he paused, nervous. I looked at him in question before he laughed again, scratching the back of his neck, "I know you say you like to be by yourself but...I think you're lying."_

_My eyes narrowed, "..."_

"_Aw, Kairi, don't go quiet on me. Let me explain," Sora started. I looked him up and down before turning to leave, "I'll catch a bus home. You don't need to drive me-"_

"_I know I don't need to but I want to. I know I don't need to talk to you but I want to. I brought you over not just for the project but so I can get to know you better," Sora continued with a determined tone in his voice._

_I paused and looked at him over my shoulder, "..."_

"_You're...going through something at home...aren't you?" he asked, tilting his head to the side ever so slightly. My heart pulled a little and a lump developed in my throat._

_He drew in a breath, "You don't have to tell me anything about your personal life...but if you're going through something...you shouldn't deal with it by yourself. That's why whoever invented the dictionary made up the word 'friend'. That's what I want to be-" he pointed at me with slanted eyes, "-whether you want me to or not."_

"_You—you can't make me allow you to be my friend. I don't want-"_

"_-Yes you do. You want friends. You're lonely. It's all over you face."_

_I glared at him, "Oh go to hell."_

_He cringed before frowning my way, "Okay...sorry...I deserve that. How about this, if you need anything, if you want some comfort you can come to me."_

_I turned to him fully, my heart a little light and my stomach having that butterfly sensation idiotic romantics seem to always talk about on TV. I never knew that such a feeling really existed...I guess that shows how much I know._

"_Is that a maybe?" he asked with a face that can put a puppy to shame. Ew. I need to get over myself._

_Sighing I answered, "If I say yes then will you give me more space?"_

"_Sure! Anything! No prob!" Sora saluted me. I looked at him with a slight grin. Sora smiled, "Ah. See? That's what I want to see. You're cuter when you do that."_

_I blushed and gruffed as I turned from him._

"_Ah! I shouldn't have said anything huh? I'm stupid! I just wiped that grin off your face. From now on I'm going to stop saying things that make you stop smiling."_

_I looked at him bewildered. That was a bit much. What was up with him anyway? I scratched my cheek and shook my head, "Don't do that...you're okay."_

_He smiled genuinely at me and my heart skipped a bit. I shook my head and took a deep breath before the door swung open to see a burly older male that looked like the exact older replica of Sora but with jet black hair shout out in earnest, "SORA! DON'T TELL ME YOU HAVE ANOTHER GIRL IN HERE!?"_

_Sora went completely pale as I felt a jolt in me perk. Turning to him, I raised an eyebrow, "Another girl...?"_

_Sora brought up his hands, waving in desperation, "It's not what you think Kairi! I promise!"_

_The Sora look-a-like older guy tilted his head to the side, "Wait...this is your GIRLFRIEND?!" He pulled Sora into a loving head lock as he gave him a rough noogie, laughing in the process, "WELL IT'S ABOUT TIME SON! YOUR OLD MAN IS SO PROUD OF YOU! WAY TO GO!"_

_I see where Sora gets his energy from._

"_Let...me...go...I...can't breathe..." Sora begged, gasping for air as he tried to free himself from his father's grip._

_My face grew red at the animated scene, "Um...sorry to disappoint you but I'm not Sora's girlfriend. I'm his project partner, Kairi Ishima...err..." I brought out my nervous hand, "...it's nice to meet you...sir..."_

_He let go of Sora as the brunette fell to his knees, coughing. The father then gave my hand a firm shake with a smile that was even more stunning than his son's. I blinked, my cheeks growing rosier, "..."_

"_She's a cute one son," Sora's dad exclaimed as his eyes fell on Sora who looked at him with narrowed eyes, "You sound like an old pervert."_

"_It's very nice to meet you too Kairi Ishima. Please treat my son right and lead him in the right direction," his dad told me grabbing my hand with both of his big ones, completely ignoring Sora's last remark. I nodded absently, dazed at how...this guy...I can't even find a word to describe this strong figure...maybe it's because I never had a father figure and to see one in person is...amazing..._

"_DAAADDD!" Sora whined as he clawed his hands to unravel from mine, "You're embarrassing me and making Kairi even more quiet by the second!"_

"_I'm your father," His father had a heroic, stony face on as he smiled pearly whites. I could've sworn I saw them sparkle, "That's what fathers do."_

_Sora punched him. I blinked in awe as his dad collected himself and laughed, "Your punches are getting stronger every time son!"_

"_Can I borrow your car so I can drive Kairi home?" Sora asked calmly as he looked over at me. I looked down, feeling out of place._

"_Sure," his dad dropped his keys in his son's palm before freezing in place, "Wait...who turned on the heater--" _

"_Bye dad, see ya when I get home!" Sora called from outside dragging me after him in a stupor. I stumbled as we climbed into the black Scion. I was amazed at the luxury of the car as Sora started the ignition and drove off. I looked back at the father who was shaking an angry fist at us. Sora was laughing easily as he gave that smile my way, "I'm in some shit when I get back."_

_I gave him a reluctant small smile, "I see."_

Now I'm standing in front of the mansion townhouse in fear. I think I came here too early. While turning on my heel to retreat I heard Ms. Lapina call from behind excitedly, "Kairi dear! There you are! I was starting to worry!"

I turned to her, blinking, "Ms...Lapina?"

_THANK GOD!_

I smiled a little as I went up the stairs, "It's good to have you back."

She laughed as she entered and I followed, "My, you're such a nice girl, Kairi. Well, it's good to be back if I may say so myself. Your Granny was very worried."

"Oh...really...?" I was trying my best to sustain the loathe in my trembling voice. Ms. Lapina looked at me in question as I forced a smile, "I'll apologize to her."

"Come back to my room when you're done. I have someone to introduce you to." Ms. Lapina retreated to her room as the maids scurried about. I took a deep breath and went upstairs to go see Granny. I ended up bumping into her. Jumping back, I held the strap of my bag tightly as I tried to look as apathetic as possible. Granny had a scowl on her face that looked like narrowed eyes and a tight straight line of her lips. I then, finally saw her age. She looked weak and fragile with all the wrinkles on her face.

_Why are you afraid of her?_

She walked past me, "I'll deal with you later."

I froze in fear, my stomach flipping as the answer came to me as quickly as the question was asked...

_She's powerful..._

I gulped and said almost inaudibly, "I'm...sorry..."

I heard her pause before continuing down the hall. I turned to her, "You were trying to kill me! WEREN'T YOU!"

She froze as she turned towards me sharply, her eyes telling me to shut up. I felt the fear and anguish coming back in a rush, "In that case...I take my apology back."

I can't believe I said that.

She narrowed her eyes at me, "I _will_ deal with you later."

I swallowed and waited for her to disappear into her room. I then walked, dazed, to Ms. Lapina's room. She was talking to a blonde, teenage girl who was my height and frame. When Lapina saw me she smiled, "Ah, Kairi, there you are. Did you apologize to your Granny?"

"Yeah..." I murmured as Lapina turned the girl around to face me. It was like looking into a mirror. The girl seemed just as shocked as the room grew awkwardly quiet. Even though the girl looked a great deal like me I felt as if she were more beautiful to society's standards and I were ordinary. I felt a ping of envy.

"This is my daughter, Naminé. Greet her," Lapina urged as she squeezed her daughter's shoulders. Naminé closed her eyes as she looked at me again. In a tiny voice she said, "Hi...Kairi. It's a...pleasure...to have you stay with us."

I nodded, uncomfortable with the formalities. I then replied, "Yeah. Same here."

"Naminé is a model but right now she's on break. Her manager and agent told me she hasn't been feeling well so she'll be staying with you and Granny for the time being. Isn't this grand Naminé honey? You have someone here your age to talk to."

Naminé slightly rolled her eyes as she fiddled with her long blonde locks. She then looked down, "I'm not interested in talking with anyone or making new friends either mother. I'm fine by myself."

Well...not only does she have my face but she has my attitude.

"Nonsense Naminé. Tell you what, Kairi will help you unpack your things into your room, that way you two can get a long faster if you don't mind."

"I do mind," Naminé argued, her voice serene like silk and fragile like tissue.

"Well, it doesn't matter. This is for your own good Naminé...whether you like it or not," Lapina started her way out of the room, "I'll be back in your room to check up on you two. I have to tell the chef of what I desire for our dinner tonight." With that last said, she disappeared.

Naminé sighed as she looked at me again and softly spoke, "Well, I'll show you to my room. The butler...I can never remember his name I've been gone for so long, he has already sent my things to the room. Shall we? I don't too much look forward to disappointing Mother."

I nodded, with a blank expression. Naminé was wearing a white tube top with Bermuda shorts on. I looked down at my Gothic wardrobe. Grand.

Naminé noticed it too, "Hmm...You don't look--"

"It's my friend's. I slept over her place last night and I forgot my clothes," I still had my bag draped over my shoulder. She eyed it, "Well...the bag?"

"Uhm...I was in a hurry. It's filled with crap," I replied, uneasily. I know I must look stupid. She shook her head, giving me a bizarre look. I slightly narrowed my eyes. She then left me, leading the way to her room.

**XoX**

"**W**ow...your room is big."

I took in to the space she had as she unzipped her suitcases. I looked over at her, realizing how tired and weary she looked. Curiously, I asked, "How's modeling like?"

"A pain. I don't recommend it to anybody," she muttered as she tossed me a very nice blouse. She told me where her closet was as she took out a tank top and went to one of her drawers. I hung up the blouse carefully, "You don't like it?"

"Nope. My mom got me an agent and manager and sent me off to do high fashion modeling over seas. She says I'm exactly what they want on the runway and the high fashion magazines," she stretched her face, "I have an interesting face they say. Ugly is beautiful in high fashion." She let go of her face, "So. I'm ugly."

"You're not ugly at all," I narrowed my eyes at her. Why was I being so nice to her? Is it because she looks like me? Well...then I would be lying to her if that's the case because I'm not a sight for sore eyes myself...well to me anyway...

Naminé sat on her bed with a huff, "They want stick skinny girls. I can't be that. I can never be that...the only way I can lose weight effectively enough is if I don't eat at all. Ha...like that's even possible."

I looked at her as the gears in the deepest darkest part of my mind stirred. A smug smirk appeared on my face. There's a way to kill someone without even using a weapon. Words can scar you mentally and in soul. Naminé is a model with a weight problem. She's not at all fat, no, but in the world of modeling and high class, high top fashion, most agencies, runways, and what not want the sizes from a 0 to a 3 or a 4. Technically I won't be killing her...she'll be killing herself...

_Do I hear Eating Disorder at hand?_

I turned to the distressed Naminé who seemed to be down in the pits at the thoughts of her profession. I gave her a sympathetic look with the goal still in mind, fresh, "Awww...I feel your pain Naminé. Say...you _can _stop eat_ing_."

She looked up at me with furrowed brows, "Isn't that a bit anorexic like? I've tried that but I fail terribly..."

"Hm...I have this friend who's a model."

"Really?"

"Yeah. She eats whatever she likes and doesn't gain any weight." I continued with a sincere grin. Naminé's eyes lit up in hope, "Really? How is that possible?"

"Easy. After she eats, she takes a trip to the bathroom and—aaaahhhhhh-" I stuck my finger in my mouth, then I drew it out, "Well, she throws it up. She sticks her finger down her throat or the end of a toothbrush and wooop, goes the food. She still feels full and she won't gain any weight."

Naminé frowned, "That...sounds kind of gross."

"Yeah. But it'll be worth it," I smiled friendly towards her.

"Wouldn't my mother...or even the maids find it odd that I keep using the bathroom?"

I looked thoughtful, "You can throw it up in a pickle jar...any jar at that and hide it so that nobody will know. It's a pretty solid idea. Think about it this way...you can finally control your weight and whatever you eat..._you_ decide whether you gain the weight or not. You'll have the power."

Naminé was contemplating what all I said before a beautiful smile graced her features, "You know Kairi...that's a great idea."

"Yeah. She told me a lot of models in the industry do that so you won't be alone. You can eat all you want and not gain _any _weight. Like tonight. Eat the food the chef gives you and then grab a jar and throw it all up."

Naminé grinned, "Thanks Kairi...you're a life saver."

I picked up another blouse from her suitcase as an evil, smug smirk graced my features, "Yup...if you only knew."

**OxO**

**A**fter eating Granny left to her room and Naminé gave her mother a hug. I looked enviously at the two as Naminé happily danced her way to her room. I walked up at my own pace, reminiscing all that I did so I can put them in my journal. When I made it to Naminé's room I heard a faint gagging sound and some coughing before I knocked on her door softly, "It's Kairi, can I come in?"

I heard a muffled "sure" before the door opened to reveal Naminé wiping her mouth with a towel. She coughed a little as she looked at me with a frown, "That was so disgusting. I hid the jar in the closet...It's...nasty to look at."

"You'll get used to it. So how'd it go?"

"Not as easy as I thought..."

"The gag reflex will disappear the more you do it. Don't worry about it. I just came to check up on you," I told her calmly with the same friendly grin.

Naminé nodded, "I guess it's okay to go to you for any problems huh?"

"Of course. I'm a friend."

"Yup. My mother is leaving tonight...not that I'm surprised."

"You two don't look at all alike. You share the same blonde hair..."

"Yeah. Well, that's only because she's not my birth mother. She took me in when I was five. The orphanage told me my mom wasn't suitable to take care of me...because she was on drugs."

"Really? That sucks, it seemed that Ms. Lapina was your real mother," I replied not really interested.

Naminé nodded, "Yeah, well even if that's true she doesn't have time for me." She shrugged nonchalantly. She then looked at me, "How about you? Where's your parents?"

I shrugged, "My mom's a prostitute. My dad is probably one of many of her customers. She's on drugs too but see, I guess she had enough sense that she couldn't care for me and left me with my granny."

"I guess we're a lot alike despite our similar facial features," Naminé grinned sympathetically. I nodded before something sparked in me, "Naminé...do you know your real mom's name?"

"No. The orphanage never told me. Why?"

"Nothing..." I murmured, "'Night..."

"Good night." Naminé shut her door as I stood there in a stupor. My hand started to shake...

"_Mommy...mommy...? Do you hear me?" a five year old version of me called as my mother drove annoyed._

"_What? Mommy's driving now, what do you want?!" she fussed as a gruff escaped her lips. I frowned before asking, "Does Kairi have a sister?"_

_My mother looked at me from her rear view mirror, "Where did this come from?"_

_I brought Mr. Teddy closer to me, my eyebrows furrowing, "Everyone else in class has a sister or a brother..."_

"_Well...yeah. What the hell, I might as well tell you. You have a sister Kairi." My mother did a sharp turn as the seat belt jolted me in place. I grew excited anyway, "Really?! Where is she mommy?!"_

"_They took her away..." my mother trailed._

"_Who?"_

"_...Child Care Services took her away...and I ran off with you..." my mother slowed herself in front of a drugstore. She turned to me, pulling locks of my hair behind my ear, "I promise...that Mommy will get better and get her back so that we can all live happily ever after..."_

"_LIKE CINDERELLA?!" I exclaimed._

_There was a tear cascading down her cheek before she pulled her lips in to hold back more tears, nodding, "Yes...a knight in shining armor will come and take you, your sister, and me away to a beautiful castle and we'll have a better happily ever after than any Disney Princess out there..."_

"_Me and sis will be princesses right?" I asked jumping in my seat._

"_That's right. Now be a good girl and wait here." She climbed out of the old station wagon as she went inside of the store. She came back with a pack on cigarettes. When she got inside I looked at her curiously as she looked at me with a frown. Then she broke down crying, holding the pack to her stomach as her head sat on the wheel of the car. I frowned, "Mommy...what's wrong?"_

_She kept on sobbing, "I'm so sorry Kairi! I'm a horrible mom! No mom should have her daughter live like this! I'm so, so, so, so sorry! I'm terrible! I don't deserve you..." She climbed in the back as she hugged me like Mr. Teddy, as though I were her only life line._

_Little did I know...she would just leave me in Granny's care soon after, promising to come back._

I was angry. I hated her. I _hate_ her! She's still out there. She never came back. I forgot her face, her voice...and I believed she would come and get me out of G_ran_ny's clutches but she never did. Those promises were all empty, fantasies for not only me but herself. There's no such thing as a knight in shining armor. You're your own rescuer. I felt tears fall from my eyes as I bit my lip and marched to my room. Naminé could be my sister. I wouldn't know. But if she is, I wouldn't be surprised. I won't, however, stop using her as an experiment. I'm not holding back.

I went into my bag for my journal.

Wait...

_Where is it?!_

I desperately went through the bag, my eyes growing wide. Where was it, where was it, where was it, where the fuck is it?! I stopped rummaging desperately for it in the bag as my heart started to thud in my chest. Where could it be...?

Then I punched the floor with hate in my eyes.

"_Larxene..."_

* * *

**_A/n:_**_ Hiya. I hoped you like. :)_

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